Eighteen
On the table, laying between her cup of coffee, her notebook, and the text she was working with, Elaine’s phone buzzed. Both she and Hadrian glanced up from their research. Hadrian’s brow arched. Elaine set down her pen and picked up her phone, frowning slightly. It was the Universe app, telling her she had a message. One corner of her mouth curled up into a smile.
Hadrian noticed. “Message from someone?”
“Yeah,” she said softly, swiping her finger across her phone’s screen to open the app and the message.
“From the one you’ve been talking to?”
Elaine nodded, her smile fading as she started to read the message.
I’m breaking my own rules in reaching out like this, but I don’t have a choice. Real talk, out of character. Don’t let him leave. Tell him I said to stay. It’s okay. Tell him I said it. He’ll try to leave. I need him to stay and he needs it, too.
He’d signed it Caius, but it didn’t matter who he’d signed it as, not really. It confirmed what she suspected without him even giving his real name.
“What’s the matter?” Hadrian asked, watching her. He’d evidently noticed her expression change, though she wasn’t quite sure what it looked like now, only knew that she wasn’t smiling anymore.
“Just a strange message,” she said quietly.
“From him?”
She nodded. “I—I think I need to go home.”
“Is everything all right?” Oddly, he didn’t sound quite as alarmed as she expected.
“I don’t know,” she said, knowing it was the honest answer, the only really honest answer she could give. “But I think I need to find out.”
“Are you all right?” Hadrian asked, his voice more gentle.
“I don’t know,” she said again, staring at her phone for a few seconds more before she started packing up her things. “I guess I’ll have to find out.”
“You’re worried.”
She managed to smile. “Usually.”
That, at least, made him laugh. He watched her as she packed up her things, laughter fading after a few seconds. “Trust him,” he finally said, softly, almost too quiet for her to hear. She paused, staring at him for a few seconds.
“Trust him?” she echoed, her voice as soft as his.
Hadrian nodded. Her brows knit.
“Hadrian—”
“Have I ever led you wrong before?”
Her mouth dried up. She shook her head. “No.”
“Then trust him,” he said gently. “It’s okay.” He paused, eyes glazing for a half a second before he added, “But hurry.”
Elaine swallowed hard and nodded. She slung her bag across her body and bolted, practically sprinting down the stairs and out into the gathering clouds of an October afternoon. It was trying to turn blustery, as Octobers did. Hopefully any sort of rain would wait until she made it home, though the wind was picking up considerably and the clouds had a concerning look to them.
I just want to make it home before the heavens open up.
With a grimace, she sprinted toward her car, parked in a lot far enough from the library that she worried that she might not make it before the rain started. A shiver wracked her as the wind gusted up, bile rising in her throat.
Trust him.
Hadrian really hadn’t ever steered her wrong before, but how did he know?
Does it matter?
She threw herself into the front seat of her car just as the first few fat drops of rain spattered against her windshield. A mumbled curse escaped her lips as she started the engine. Thunder rumbled in the distance. Somehow, she knew this storm was going to be a doozy—she could feel it.
I just need to get home before it gets worse.
She wasn’t sure how much worse it was going to get, but again, her gut told her there was reason enough for concern. Caius’s note and Hadrian’s words coupled with the storm had left her that much of an impression.
She sped out of the parking lot, down the street toward home, heart beating faster than usual but not too fast. Her windshield wipers whipped back and forth as more rain joined those first few drops. It was a hard rain, sounding like pellets pounding against her car’s roof. For a few seconds, she wondered if it was actually hail, but she couldn’t see anything but rain falling through her windshield.
She left her research in the car when she arrived home, bolting with only her jacket and her phone to her front porch. Elaine fumbled with her keys as thunder rumbled again, lightning forking through the sky somewhere high above. Another shiver wracked her. Had the temperature dropped, or was it just her imagination?
At this point, it was anyone’s guess.
She unlocked the door. The house was quiet as she dropped her keys on the table in the foyer. “Joss? Jason?”
No answer, though she could hear faint sounds from Joslyn’s room. She started to breathe a little easier. Nothing seemed wrong.
Maybe it’s preemptive? Maybe there’s nothing wrong.
Elaine exhaled and glanced toward the slider out to the patio, watching the rain fall in torrents. Thunder rumbled, nearer now, its depth rattling the plates and glasses in the cupboard.
She shivered again and was glad that she’d made it home in time.
Losing half a day’s worth of plowing through materials, though. Elaine shrugged slightly. Maybe Hadrian was right, maybe she needed to allow herself that kind of break—maybe she needed to give herself permission not to feel guilty about it, too.
Either way, she wasn’t going out in the storm to get the research she’d left in the car. That was going to have to wait until later, one way or another. She tugged her phone out of her pocket, setting it on the edge of the kitchen counter as she started to shrug out of her jacket. Faintly, as she ducked back into the foyer to hang up her jacket, she heard her phone buzz again on the counter, then heard it hit the floor.
Shit. I should’ve set it a little further in. Hope I didn’t crack my screen.
Ducking back into the kitchen, she scooped her phone up from the floor, checking her screen for cracks—it had already gone dark; whatever had caused it to vibrate hidden. Upstairs, she heard the floor creak and a second later, Jason’s voice.
“What?”
That doesn’t sound good. Elaine stuffed her phone into her back pocket, heading for the stairs. She could still hear his voice, though muffled enough that she couldn’t make out the words as she jogged up the stairs, taking them two at a time in her haste. She heard Joslyn asking what was wrong—at least, that’s what she assumed the question was from the cadence of her friend’s voice. Jason didn’t answer—it sounded like he might be on the phone. Elaine frowned as she moved down the hall toward the bedroom.
I have a bad feeling about this. Christ, do I ever have a bad feeling about this.
What the hell is going on?
She reached back to grab her phone when the door to the bedroom opened and Jason came out, dressed in only his shorts, his complexion ashen. Joslyn was on his heels, but they both stopped dead in their tracks at the sight of her standing in the hallway.
“What’s wrong?” Elaine asked, looking Jason dead in the eye. “What happened?”
Jason shook his head, adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed and started walking again, twisting to move past her toward the stairs. “I have to go.”
Elaine glanced at Joslyn, whose lips were drawn together tightly in a pale line across her face. Her friend shook her head slightly and Elaine frowned, then turned to follow Jason, already halfway down the stairs.
“Jason, wait.”
“I need to eat something, I need to get dressed, and I need to go,” he said, headed for the fridge. There were scars on his back from who knew what, a tattoo of a compass over a sword on the back of his left shoulder blade. “Something happened at home,” he said a second later, as if a peace offering after failing to answer her initial question.
“He said not to let you go.”
Jason froze, standing with the refrigerator door open, his hand wrapped around the carton of milk. Slowly, he straightened again, shoving the milk back onto the shelf as he twisted to look at her. “What?”
“Your brother said not to let you go,” she said. “I got a message from him. That’s why I rushed home—he said he broke his rules to send the message.”
Joslyn’s fingers tangled in the sleeve of Elaine’s sweater as she gripped her friend’s arm. “Jason, what is going on?”
His expression crumpled slightly, brow creasing in distress even as his jaw hung slightly agape, his breathing abruptly ragged as he closed the fridge and stumbled to a chair. He dropped into it heavily, tossing his phone onto the table with a faint clatter. “He lied to me,” he whispered, staring blankly at the edge of the table—through the edge of the table, the look Elaine had heard called a thousand yard stare. Joslyn’s fingers tightened around her arm.
“Who did?” Joslyn whispered.
“My brother.” He squeezed his eyes shut. “Peter lied to me. He said everything was okay.”
The two women exchanged a look. Elaine nudged Joslyn toward the table and headed for the counter, intending to make a pot of coffee. Joslyn didn’t go to the table right away, instead turning to snag a blanket from the back of a chair in the living room. She wrapped it around Jason’s shoulders before she drew a chair up in front of him, sitting in it so their knees touched. Elaine watched as her friend took his hands and squeezed.
“Jason, talk to me,” Joslyn said softly. “Please.”
“He lied and he said everything was okay,” Jason said again, leaning forward. Joslyn leaned forward, too, and their foreheads touched. Elaine only watched for another second before she turned around, staring a pot of coffee. “He said it was a false alarm.”
“I don’t get it,” Joslyn said softly. “What’re you talking about? What kind of false alarm?”
Elaine’s phone buzzed in her pocket again and she winced, staring at the coffee pot. She tugged her phone out, glancing at Joslyn and Jason. Joslyn’s fingers were tangled up in Jason’s, squeezing so hard her knuckles had gone white. She couldn’t quite tell from this angle, but she thought there might be tears on Jason’s cheek.
She swallowed hard and looked away again, checking her phone.
Two more messages from the game—two more messages that could only have come from him.
What the hell is going on?
Leaning against the counter, she swiped a finger across the first message.
I will tell you everything, the message said. Just don’t let him leave. He needs to be there not here. Tell him.
Then, the second: I need to talk to you. Soon. I’m sorry.
Elaine exhaled a shaky sigh and straightened, putting her phone away before she started getting down three coffee mugs. “Just breathe, Jason,” she said quietly, gathering the mugs and the jar of sugar, some spoons from the drawer and the creamer from the refrigerator. “Try to calm down.”
He sucked in one rasping breath, then another, shaking his head slowly. As Elaine set her cargo down on the table, she could see that yes, those were tears on Jason’s cheeks. She winced.
Why did you make me the messenger? Why can’t you do this yourself?
He looked up at her, tears sparkling in his lashes, rimming his eyes like jewels that sparkled in what little light the storm outside hadn’t stolen yet. “What exactly did he say to you?” Jason asked, his voice little more than a whisper, so full of anguish and pain that it made Elaine’s own heart ache.
“He said it’s okay,” Elaine told him, her voice soft. “He needs you to stay and you need you to stay. That’s what he said. He said he broke his own rules to reach out to me but it was important.”
“Why didn’t he just call me himself?” Jason stared at the floor for a few seconds. Joslyn leaned further forward, wrapping her arms around him and squeezing tight. Elaine swallowed hard and turned away to get the coffee.
“Can I see it?” Jason asked as she turned away.
She glanced back as she reached the counter, picked up the carafe. “See what?”
“The message he sent you,” Jason said. “Can I see it?”
Elaine nodded. She brought the coffee over, set down the carafe, dug her phone out of her pocket. She handed it to Jason and then started to pour the coffee. Hunching, Jason opened the app, then the first message she’d gotten that day from Caius—from Peter. From his brother.
From the fucking founding force behind GreySoft. Fuck me what the hell is going on?
She stole a glance at him as he read the message—he must have read it twice, because he was looking at it for what felt like a long time. His lips thinned and he carefully set her phone down on the edge of the table, the hand that had been holding it covering his eyes. His shoulders shook and then Joslyn was hugging him again. He wrapped his arms around her, buried his face against her neck.
Elaine gently set down a cup of coffee near him and took her phone back. Joslyn looked up at her, a question in her eyes.
“Caius and I have been talking,” Elaine said as she poured another cup of coffee, this one for Joslyn. “Ever since the other night.”
“I thought that was all in character stuff,” Joslyn said, her voice barely audible. “What’s going on?”
“It was,” Elaine said. “Today that changed. I don’t know what’s going on, but—” she stopped, looking at Jason for a few seconds, leaning against Joslyn, his arms tight around her. “—but he said he’d explain everything. I just got the message right before you guys came out of your room.”
“My sister called,” Jason said, his voice muffled and raw. He turned his head so he could just barely see Elaine, his eyes already bloodshot. “She said that Peter had gone back to the hospital this morning to see his neurologist. That they were talking about courses of action and plans and about what was going on.” Jason exhaled, shaking his head. “He told me the day we launched full-immersion that it was nothing, that it was a false alarm and that his doctor had given him some anti-seizure meds and told him he needed to take it easy. I believed him.” He exhaled, shoulders slumping even as his arms tightened around Joslyn, wrapped around her waist. “I’m such an idiot. Why did I believe him?”
“Because he’s your brother,” Joslyn said. “Because you guys love each other and why wouldn’t you believe him.”
Jason exhaled a shaky sigh. Elaine slowly set down Joslyn’s cup of coffee, then started filling one for herself.
“Maybe he didn’t know,” Elaine said softly. “Maybe something changed after you left.”
“Then why didn’t he call?” Jason asked. “Why would he leave me in the dark? He always calls, always tells me. Why wouldn’t he have done that this time?”
Elaine looked at him, then her gaze slid over to Joslyn, then back again. Jason squeezed his eyes shut.
He swore under his breath, closing his eyes again. “Of course. Of fucking course. My big brother, always trying to take care of me when no one else will.”
“Not no one,” Joslyn said. Jason took a deep breath, straightening to look at her. He smiled weakly.
“No,” he agreed. “Not no one. He sent me to someone he knew would.” He reached up, brushing some of Joslyn’s hair back from her face, tucking it behind her ear as his thumb brushed along her cheek and jaw. “If you’re right, Elaine, he at least must have suspected something.” He swallowed hard again, then sighed. “And I know he did—and so did I. I just let him convince me—let me convince me—that it really was nothing. Just a false alarm. We fooled ourselves for a few minutes into believing everything was fine.” Another shaking breath, another exhale. He shook his head. “We let ourselves believe what we wanted to believe, what we needed to believe, but we were wrong. We were wrong and that’s what hurts the most.”
