Author: Erin Klitzke

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Reconnecting with my research

It’s no secret to a lot of people who know me–in the wake of not getting one last little bit of feedback from my late advisor at the end of the Winter 2009 semester, I took a long break from my thesis work.  It was something I probably shouldn’t have done, but I kept expecting to get somethingfrom him after I sent one last update to him this past April.  But nothing.  We corresponded via e-mail about some housekeeping things regarding my thesis and he said he would get to the submission, but he never got back to me.  In some morbid way, I wonder if it’s sitting there on his hard drive with a mess of fantastic comments just waiting to never be sent.  But I suppose I’ll never know.

For the past week since I heard about his death, I’ve been avoiding really trying to work on my thesis, instead focusing on a paper I need to submit for the Great Lakes History Conference, deadlined in mid-October.  But the research overlaps a bit when I start reading about Edward I, and that’s tripped synapses in my brain that have pointed me back toward my thesis.  This is dangerous, considering that I don’t even know that I’ll even have this be my thesis come next week, or come the end of the OUAAUP strike, whichever happens first (personally, I’m hoping it’s settled after negotiations today so I won’t actually miss any of my classes this semester).  It’s in part hinging on a conversation I need to have with Karen Miller, the head of the history department here at Oakland University.  But in the end, I don’t know what’s going to happen other than I have a pile of research and information floating around in my brain that may turn into a book someday, regardless of whether or not it becomes my master’s thesis.  I’m sure if I have to change gears and start another project, I can find something.  I’m just not sure at this point what.

When I went to Dr. Finucane a couple years ago to talk about potential thesis ideas, I brought with me a short list of potential topics.  I’d originally wanted to do something with the Crusades, but I don’t speak French or Arabic (to be honest, even my Latin is shaky at best, though I’m working on that) so it would be very difficult for me to do that sort of research.  So changing gears, I brought the following list: 

–          Impact of the War of the Roses on English society

o       Potentially limited to women, church, or the aristocracy?

–          Hundred Years War

o       Religion and politics

–          Folk beliefs and spirituality in late medieval England

o       Mysticism in England?

o       English Saints?  Shifting views of what was seen as evidence of the divine working through a person or related to a person? (ties into witchcraft, ect)

–          Kingship and royalty in England, late medieval

o       Touches on the political and diplomatic; alliances through marriage, blood claims to “foreign” territory – importance of women in this context?

o       Political legitimacy and the tools used to convince people of such

–          The Black Death

o       Impact on cultural norms and religion

–          Mystics and miracles in late medieval England

–          Pilgrims and saints

–          Left field: Arthurian mythos and its impact on English culture orthe historical evolution of the Arthurian mythos

o       Use of the Arthurian mythos by English royalty

o       Folklore and stories of medieval England

 

 

I had hesitated to even bring to him that last topic–about the Arthurian mythos.  But I’ve been fascinated with it for easily ten years, so I put it on there, never dreaming that he would look at that and say “Hm.  That’s interesting.  Why didn’t you think you could do that, again?”  Necessary cutting brought the project down to a manageable size and focus, bringing me to where I am now, looking at the uses of the Arthurian legend under (and mainly by) Edward I and Edward III (and consequently the failure to use it by Edward II).  Looking back, I think I’d write on any of those subjects, except for perhaps the Black Death–which is fine, since the Plague has been done to death (no pun intended).  But if I have to change my thesis topic, would I be able to do any of those?  The Hundred Years War, perhaps, since my second reader is a specialist in French history.  But this having been said, I don’t read or speak French (though I have to learn).  It would be a difficult project to gather primary source material for.

The medieval period is something I’m fascinated by and would rather write about than the Renaissance, which I have a feeling would be the period I would end up having to write about, simply based on the makeup of the department.  But we’ll have to see.  I was blessed to work under one of the most preeminent medieval historians of the past thirty years, but cursed to lose that mentorship before my thesis was complete.  Only time will tell what’s going to become of the work I began under his tutelage.

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Torg update – Session of 3 September 2009

So after a somewhat insane day at the university, I got to play Torg on Thursday night, yay!

We picked up on the deck of Red Hood’s ship and chatted with Galen a bit more.  We were told last week (and I forgot to mention it) that Mable had been infected with killer nanites that were trying to decide whether or not they should kill her–they were designed to kill her Race (or something) counterpart.  As a result of this revelation, she spent a lot of time drinking with Chris.

Mei and Ren can’t make heads or tails of the prophecy that Mei’s trying to sort out.  There’s a few theories floating around in Ren’s brain and she likes none of her theories.  At all.

Galen reported that the new hardware on Fred was keeping him alive.  This got Ren even more worried (she’s very concerned that somehow Odette/Odyle has a kill switch on him, or has otherwise programmed him to do something very, very nasty to the group) and caused Galen to observe that she struck him as someone who worries a lot.  She admitted to it, but asked who else was going to do the worrying.  Galen wanted to know if she was familiar with ulcers and Ren told him she didn’t have one.  “Yet.”  Galen says.  And he’s probably right.

After that, Galen wandered over to Grace and talked to her about Rosebud, her alien symboite we found originally in the Temple of the Starfire Wheel.  He told her in order to get Rosebud back, she had to be patient, humble, and something else.  Either way, the three together had the rest of us snickering and saying “Oh man.  She’s never getting that thing back!”

We decide, ultimately, to go back to one of our many beginnings–the Temple of the Starfire Wheel–to hopefully find something that’s like a clue to where this Well of Forever is.  The Red Hood thinks this is an utterly fantastic idea and decides to continue to chauffer us around–at least for a little while longer.  Ren isn’t about to be looking any gift horses in the mouth at this point and takes what she can get.

We find the Temple of the Starfire Wheel in a little more disrepair than it was before–that is, someone had removed large sections of pictographs from the walls.  We found a passageway that we hadn’t found the first time and Mable blew it open with a shaped charge (much to Ren’s dismay).  At the far end of the place we find a niche that has the D.E.M.O.N. emblem resting in it–clearly, that wasn’t what was originally there.  We all decide that it’s a trap, and Grant finally tells the group what he and Ren had discussed in the past–that Odette had probably been working toward this all along.  Ren admits to trying to kill Odette/Odyle while they were in France and says that if she thought she could have shot straight, she’d have tried to take her out when they first saw her in the streets during the papal speech.  Further, Grant theorizes that the people that made it to the Temple of the Starfire Wheel were deliberately brought there (there was no way that Ren should have survived a Tharkoldu raid, and she admits it).  It was all arranged–and he’s probably just paranoid enough to be right.

The group decides, over Ren’s quiet objections, that we should go to the D.E.M.O.N. installation in Austria where she had worked, regardless of whether or not it’s a trap.  And so we set off again, flying north.

Of course, our troubles neither began nor ended there.  En route, someone spots something on an intercept course.  Rocket Rangers, but of an evil variety.  Mable is livid.  These are the men that killed her fiancee, she tells us.  (Ren was like “What’s going on?  You know about these guys?”  Mable: “They killed my fiancee!”  Ren:  “Oh.  Okay.”)  So now we’re set to fight them, even though they have the advantage of more mobility in flight than we have.

This having been said, we have a grenade launcher and a plasma cannon.  God help us all.

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Torg update – Session of 27 August 2009

So…after three weeks without game, we actually got to play last week (and of course, I procrastinate on my update).  We’d been left with some pretty significant cliffhangers from the session before (GM’s never allowed to give us another cliffhanger before a week off ever again–especially if he’s going to get Con plague) and most of the session dealt with the resolution of those cliffhangers.

Grace’s resolution was perhaps the most anticlimatic.  The Marquis just…walked away.  Told her where to find Fred and just left.  There was a lot of blinking that went into that.

Ano found himself looking at a lump of flesh and metal that was Frederico DeSoto in a stupor worse than any alcohol-induced haze than we’ve ever seen him in.  What’s worse?  Ano has no hope of lifting this guy up, and his only job is to get him the hell out of there.  Even between him and Grace (who arrived to help), they could barely get him moving.  Of course, they had a little more excitement on the way out…

Topside, things aren’t going so well for Mei, Chris, and Mable.  They’re in a stalemate with the Hunter–one of them agaisnt him would almost certainly lose.  Mei and Chris, of course, start fighting over who’s going to grab Mable and run.  Chris decides it’s going to be him.  This plan is full of fail.  Mei ends up pulling out the chip that’s a governor on her ability to use bullet-time (thus killing the limits on the ability) and does a very good job of distracting the Hunter while Christian grabs Mable and starts to run….and sees the Marquis quietly leaving.  The Marquis who he has a major bone to pick with.

In the meantime, Ren plays prisoner with Odyle (who backpedals on bits of things she said before).  The plan of Ren attempting to fake being Allison didn’t work so well (partially due to GM confusion), but “WWAD” definately paid off when Odyle was getting ready to zot Ren into a pit.  A well-placed distraction and a high-tech bullet put Odyle down long enough for Ren and Grant to make an escape–and quickly learn that the cavalry (which is to say, a bunch of crazy French knights on the side of the pope) is on the way.

Grace, Ano, and Fred have a close encounter with the result of Grace’s Nemesis card, an Executioner named the Sorrow.  He’s got it out for Grace–and she gets a taste of some pain before he bails out.  Ren and Grant arrive shortly thereafter and all five head for the surface.

In the meantime, Chris has grabbed Mable and made a run for it….then proceeded to drop Mable somewhere “safe” along the way and made a move on the Marquis, who he managed to get by his metal gorget.  They exchange some harsh words–some of which are important, such as the Marquis admitting that he knows where Odyle/Odette is going.  She’s headed east, to something called the Well of Forever (also called the Well of Souls in some references, according to the GM, but we don’t know that in character yet).  He warned that anyone looking into the well to find truth should be careful, because sometimes the well looks back.  This information is later passed on to the rest of us.  Before letting the Marquis go, Chris vows to end him should they meet again.  I’m not looking forward to meeting this guy ever again myself (Ren doesn’t really like the taste of drywall, thank you).

I don’t rightfully remember what sent the Hunter scurrying (was it a bunch of Tachicomas?  probably), but we did start booking down the streets of Avignon, really not sure how we were going to get the hell out of the city–and Mara didn’t have any ideas on that one, either.  Odyle shows up with this gun bigger than she is and gets ready to take shots at us….only to be distracted by Tachicomas that were really, really happy to see her.  She wastes one and then they get really confused.  We ran.

And then the Red Hood and her zepplin rescue us–someone called in a favor (not Yuri; I have my theories on who might have been responsible for saving our arses, though), though she won’t tell us who it was.  And we’re sailing away, to the east–putting as much sky between us and France as possible about now.

The first morning we’re on the zep, the Technomage that’s been haunting Mei shows up…and starts talking.  He’s in violation of some rules by coming and talking to us, he tells us.  I don’t remember getting to talk much before we called for the night (it was already 10 by the time we got rescued, which didn’t leave a lot of time for heavy plot discussions).

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Reflections on Kennedy lost

They’re burying Edward Kennedy today, and in watching the funeral, I found myself getting choked up, teary-eyed over a man I never met, never knew except for brief appearances on television, glances at the Congressional record, never even read that much about.  Compared to what I (used) to know about his brothers, what I knew about Edward Kennedy could fill a thimble.  And yet here I was, watching his funeral mass, and I was choking up.  I know I have a tendency to get overly emotional about some things, but this?  When my mother told me he died, I was sad, but no tears.  Nothing like that.  Just “Oh.”  Even though standing in my kitchen with my mother, I knew something had changed and probably not for the better, it still…didn’t quite strike me.

In part, I guess it comes down to the fact that Edward Kennedy was the only very politically active–and successful, despite faults and mistakes–Kennedy I ever ‘knew.’  I know the stories of his brothers, Jack and Bobby, but I didn’t live those times.  The older I got, the more I came to realize that while the brothers were inspiring figures, Ted accomplished volumes more–and I wonder if either JFK or Bobby could have done more if they had lived.  I’m not sure it’s possible for that to have happened, given the turbulent times that they lived in.  I think that Bobby would have had more chance than JFK.  JFK’s presidency is tragic, storied…but I have a feeling that it would have ended in disappointment, both for him and everyone that looked to him as some sort of shining beacon of hope.  (There’s an incredible irony here, given all the comparisons made between him and Barack Obama–I admit to having a great deal more faith in Barack than my historian’s eye will allow me to have toward a “what if” of JFK’s presidency.)

The fact of the matter is, when you get right down to it, that Edward Kennedy could never cover up all the mistakes he made in his personal life and yet still make an incredible difference in American political life.  The Lion of the Senate, patriarch to a family that is now suddenly bereft of one (it will be interesting to see who rises to the occassion inside of the clan to take on the enormous mantle Ted shouldered).  He was so much and did so much…but he was still a father, a brother, a husband, an uncle, a grandfather–you can look at the faces of his family and know that, to see the pain that’s stoic and raw at the same time–stoic because they’re on camera, raw because even though his death was a foregone conclusion, you know that they weren’t ready to lose him.  You’re never ready for a blow like that.

I found the prayers for intercession, offered by his children, nieces and nephews and grandchildren, to be the most poignant part of the service (beyond, perhaps, Kara Kennedy’s responsal psalm, which I’ll have to identify later).  I hope god really does hear those prayers, because I can’t really imagine who will take up everything that Edward championed–or who can afford to, who’s powerful enough to take them up without totally torpedoing their political career.  They’re things that are necessary and right and without them…I don’t know where the country and the world will end up.

God will have a lot for the Senator to accomplish in heaven before his next time on earth.  He’s certainly paid his penance for his mistakes in this life, in working so hard for the common good.  There will be some that will say no, he’s going to hell for this sin, for that sin.  I don’t believe that’s the case, nor do I believe that he’s going to languish in purgatory for mistakes made.  No…he’s got important work to do.  He started it in this life, and it’ll be continued in the next, of that I’m certain.

Go softly, Senator.  You’re already dearly missed, but the respite is deserved.

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Musings on NaNoWriMo

So I’ve kept saying over and over again since last year (actually, since before last year) that I wasn’t going to try to do NaNoWriMo again since graduate school inevitably prevents me from actually getting it done.  The ideas tend not to be my strongest or my best (When All’s Said and Done, my first NaNo, is a huge exception to that; I really need to go back and do a second draft on it to add in some more stuff regarding miss Allyson and suchnot) or my longest stewed over, which hurts whatever I write to begin with.

Of course, I keep saying that I’m not going to put myself through the stress of it again, especially with so many half-started (half-finished, mostly finished) writing projects already, plus my thesis, plus two classes, plus everything else.  Shiawase, among others, talked me into doing it last year.  I got about 26,000 words in and had to call it there.  I’ve kept the project, still untitled, and poke it every so often (it’s a prequel to a post-apocalyptic Arthurian reimagining that I want to write someday–another one of those half-started projects–that’s based in part on a short story I wrote in college), though not often at all.  Epsilon more often captures me (that’s trying to become three books from two, with one focusing on the resistance movement in the Borderworlds.  We’ll see what happens).  But I digress, as I often do.

An idea has been tugging in the back of my brain for the past several days, a confluence of some things that happened at work and some random musings.  I work in retail clothing sales, so I meet all kinds of people and help people find clothes for all kinds of occassions.  An incident this past weekend got me to thinking about one of the strangest customers I’ve had in the thirty-some odd months I’ve worked there, and that in part triggered the idea for what may or may not end up being my NaNoWriMo project for this year.  The other part that’s inspired me was thinking philosophically about World of Warcraft, the internet, and how we meet and come to know people through cyberspace without actually knowing much about their “real lives,” their “real” circumstances.  These things coming together have given me a starting point for a potential NaNoWriMo project for this year.  I’ll probably do some scribblings about it today before work, maybe, while I’m grabbing my dinner (otherwise, I’ll be reading in the cafe at Macy’s like I usually end up doing–one or the other).  I suppose in part the idea is also inspired by .hack//sign though only in a vague sense–some of the elements of my idea are similar, but only on the surface.

“Byron” is a very sick young man, probably in his early twenties or so, with little hope of survival.  He retreats into “Universe,” a VR-equipped (though not required) MMORPG that’s become popular in the past several years.  He’s played since launch and is somewhat popular and powerful as a result.  “Iryn” or “Ryn” is a more recent comer to the game and isn’t a big fan of Byron’s at first, until she gets to know him thanks to a mutual friend (maybe the mutual friend gave her the account?  I have to brainstorm more).  Byron and Ryn form a tight bond and after a while, Byron opens up to Ryn, telling her about his out-of-game circumstances.  Out of the blue, after this, she receives a VR rig for the game.  Not too long after this, she realizes that he’s stopped logging out of the game and starts to worry.  She ends up tracking him down thanks to some other friends and meets his terrified parents.  Byron, having suffered some painful, difficult setbacks, has completely retreated into the game through virtual reality and cannot be pulled out–he has to make the choice to log out, which he will not do.  Ryn convinces him to log out for the sake of his parents, at least for a little while.  I don’t have much more than this figured out (it’s a very new idea, after all), but it’s a start, at least.  Maybe I’ll be attempting NaNoWriMo this year after all.

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Torg update – session of 6 August 2009

So…a plan come up with shortly before leaving for session kind of sort of worked (yes, Vee, you’re right and we’re crazy, but maybe what we ended up doing might work out for us).  No evacuation plan for the Inquisition prison we were going to break into…but misdirection seemed to work in our favor, at least for a while.

While on our way to the site of the Inquisition prison where Frederico DeSoto’s being held, Ren suggests that maybe we should let Mable set off some explosive distractions–the sort of things that will let some of us sneak inside hopefully unnoticed.  She intended it to be a lot more hands-off than it ended up being, but in the end I’m generally more flexible than most.  The plan, of course, gets changed even before we start setting it up and the group splits between an infiltration team (Ren, Grant, Grace, and Ano) and team violence (Christian, Mei, and Mable).  Grant and Mable are going to rig up some explosives in optimal places and Grant’s going to find a good way in for the infiltration team first and then we’re going to start in, hoping to rescue Fred without everyone getting dead.

Ren, of course, chooses this moment to grab Grant by the collar and kiss him full-on, earning a surprised (but not displeased) look from him and a very dirty look from Mable.  She tells him to be careful and he tells her “It’s better with the mask.”  And then Mable and Grant go to set up explosives for the distraction team violence will be responsible for.  They come back in the same amount of pieces we went them off in.  In the meantime, Ren muses to herself about wearing the mask or not.  She decides she’s going to.

Team violence wanders off first.  They walk into what appears (key word being “appears”) to be a run-down old Cathedral.  Inside appears to be more of the same until Mei notices and wastes a camera.  Which results in a hologram appearing–a hologram of our good friend the Marquis, the same one who put some of us (ie, Ren) through walls while we were in Japan, the same one we hoped had died in that warehouse we tried to blow up in Japan.  He advises us to get the hell out of Dodge.  He’s basically told in his dreams, we’re coming to get Fred and that’s the end of it (we’re really not sure why Christian decided to tell him that we were after Fred).  Which earned us a “bring it” and the hologram disappearing.  Mei finds the entrance to the lower levels–basically, the prison and the like–and rips the door up and open.

Violence ensues, though it’s a bit of time before we get the explosion that the infiltration team was waiting for.  As soon as we get that first explosion, Grant takes off like a shot without saying a word and the rest of us are at his heels.  Of course, we’re in the first hallway when we just barely miss getting toasted by a trap (he saved Ren, again) but with the infiltration team cut in half by a very, very heavy stone slab.  Of course…this could be both a good thing and a bad thing.  It depends on who you ask.  So Ren and Grant head off to find Fred while Grace and Ano are left to figure out another way in.

Insane violence is taking place outside.  Ano and Grace find a new way into the tunnels…but it’s not too long before they run into our old friend the Marquis.  Grace starts trying to talk to him after throwing Ano back down the hallway.  Grant and Ren reach an impasse and have two options: either they wander around blindly trying to find the prison cells or they abuse some guards and “convince” them to tell us where they are.  Grant is once again surprised when Ren’s okay with hitting the abuse the guard button.  So we run into a group of four guards.  Grant pwns three of them and Ren trains both guns on the last and makes him shit himself in fear (apparently, the punk didn’t feel very lucky).  And then she gets to see a bit of Grant’s dark side (…something tells me he’s a little surprised how okay with it she is) as he “convinces” the guard to tell us where to find the prison cells before the guard is rendered violently unconscious.

Meanwhile, topside, the demon that almost gutted Grant the day before has shown up and gotten its claws into Mable.  Thank god that Mei was paying attention, because otherwise we’d be needing another demolitions tech.  Things went from bad to worse up there because the demon has a slight edge on Mei.  Chris eventually manages to intervene and they slowly start to push the demon back.  And that’s the cliffhanger they were left with.

Somewhere between the surface and the prison cells, Grace manages to get some interesting information out of the Marquis.  Apparently, he’s been questioning a lot of the same things we’ve been questioning.  Grace finally asks him, “Why don’t you just let us take Fred and leave France and never come back.”

Marquis: “What does that get me other than killed by the Inquistors for losing my charge?”

Grace pauses, and then: “You could always come with us.”

And that’s the cliffhanger that she was left with.

Grant and Ren reach the prison block after abusing some more guards.  Grant produces a ring of keys and once again brings up the phrase, “You’re not going to like this.”

“You use that around me a lot.”

“Well, you tend to not like anything that involves danger.”

Which is true.  Danger means people are going to get hurt.  Getting hurt is bad.  But once again she surprises him.  He’s managed to lift a key ring from one of the guards, but this is a place where they lock up all kinds of bad people.  We’ve got to open cells and let some potentially very nasty shit loose.  Ren grins at him and holds out her hand for the key ring.

“You’re a better shot than I am.”

This he can’t disagree with.  But before Ren can get the first door unlocked, Odyle shows up and starts taunting Ren.  Of course, Ren deduces that she’s here to cause trouble–big surprise.  Grant’s disappeared in the meantime, and Ren trusts that he’ll have her back if she needs him–when she needs him the most, since that’s his style.  Odyle underestimates Ren, thinking that she hadn’t made a decision on whether or not she can hurt the girl.  Ren, of course, has made her decision.

Damn guns jamming.  Odyle gets annoyed with Ren’s attempt to solve the problem once and for all and smacks her in the head with her zotty staff.  It was pain.  Odyle asks if she’s ready to do it the easy way now.  Ren shrugs and decides to play prisoner, for the time being.  And that’s where my cliffhanger was, in part.

Ano, meanwhile, has made it to Fred’s cell at about the same time as Grant, who looks at Ano and tells him that his only job now is to get the man in that cell safely out of the prison.

Grant: “I left someone behind that I have to go pick up.”

He picks the lock and dashes off.  And that’s where we cut for the evening.

We’ll have a week off next week since some of the crew will be at GenCon.  I’ve teased David about consistently giving us cliffhangers when we’re going to be off for a week.  It happens every time.

It’ll be interesting to see how all of this plays out.  Hopefully–hopefully–in our favor.  We’ll have to see.